Sep

{A LITTLE ABOUT ME}

Posted by: Sonny in

I lived the first forty two years of my life as an atheist. I was an activist atheist for a few years in my twenties. What I mean by this is that I sought out opportunities to try to destroy someone’s faith through debate. I was a very self-centered person. I loved myself and had to dispense the little that was left over cautiously. Needless to say, I didn’t really care about many people.

I didn’t realize that I was actually serving the enemy. I didn’t believe in him either. But he is real also and almost destroyed my life.

I did love my wife, Tammy, just not enough. My self-centeredness came to a point right after our 10^th anniversary. We separated and divorced and I went down a path of darkness to a point of depression that led me to decide on suicide. As one who believed the only life we had was here, being as miserable as I was just wasn’t worth it. Trying to write this makes me realize it really makes no sense. But does suicidal depression ever make sense?

Then, right when my plans were decided on and put into motion, something happened which made me aware that God was real and He loved me. He interjected Himself into my life, interrupting my plans and forcing me to see that He was real. He did this by pulling a supernatural stunt that he knew I could not deny. He barged right on into my life and probably had a good time watching as I desperately scrambled to make some sense out of His intrusion.

I postponed my immediate plans and actually wrestled with this new awareness. I wanted to figure out some way to deny Him still. But I am, even if not especially bright, very logical and analytical in my thinking. I simply couldn’t deny that something happened to me that was so simple yet could not happen in the natural world.

Okay. He was real. But who was He? As one who liked to argue, I had studied a lot of religions. I was an equal opportunity jerk to those with faith. But whoever this God was, He had made it a point to save me from death and eternal destruction. He must have loved me even if I denied Him. Because He loved me and had mercy on me I knew He was the God of the bible and not some other god. If this was the case, I knew I had to serve Christ. Since then I have did my best to fight the good fight.

The more I mature in my faith, the more I see that there really is a war going on. It is one we are supposed to be fighting in with our King. Jesus needs us all to just do our part. I see this blog as an opportunity to do some damage to the enemy. I used to only love myself. But now I,

Love you all.

15 comments so far

Shannon

Sonny,

We’re so grateful that we’re on this faith journey in Christ alongside you! Thanks for sharing the powerful testimony of how God knows how to get our attention and speak to us right where we are. You and Tammy are a tremendous blessing to us. May the Lord continue to bless you both as you bear witness to his love and advance his Kingdom.

Peace

September 14th, 2008 at 2:34 am

Tammy

Sonny,
I do not say often enough how proud I am to be your wife. I knew God would fufill His promise, but I could not have envisioned the depths He would go to use you. He has truly given you gifts in wisdom, knowledge and understanding of His word. I have grown mightily since you yielded to God that night. Thank you for responding to God when He supernaturally changed the radio in your vehicle to allow you to hear “I Can Only Imagine.”
Thank you God for hearing Sonny 4 years prior, when he said, ” If God were to come down and get my attention, I would believe that
He existed,” and then undeniably meeting that challenge!

I love you
Tammy

September 14th, 2008 at 4:15 pm

Dee Prince

Sonny,
Your wisdom and knowledge have challenged me many times. I’d like to think my relationship with Christ is better that it has ever been because of the truth you teach. My husband, Rodney starting coming to church on Wednesday night when I came home and told him he should come and hear what you had to say. Since you WERE an atheist and now serve Christ, your perspective is one that shows us how to sort through the junk and take a stand to believe in the ONE TRUE GOD. You ask questions(we tease you and say they are “trick” questions) that make us think about what we truly believe and why we believe they way we do. Your classes have taught me to search the word and cling to the truth. You are a blessing to our church, my family and I know the angels and God are rejoicing!! God Bless you,
We Love you too!!
Dee

September 21st, 2008 at 10:02 pm

Sonny

Thank you Dee

I love you and your family also. I appreciate what you do for me also, both now and in the past when you stood with Tammy.

September 21st, 2008 at 10:18 pm

Carey Dunlap

Sonny,
I know what its like to wonder where God is. I was there for a long time after my wife at the time was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and Schizophrenia. Everyone was praying for her, however she refused to accept her illness and would not take her neccesary medication to control it. This produced several problems within the household. She was just out of control, and could be very dangerous to be around. It became so severe that DHR got involved and I sent the kids to my parents for a while in an effort to support her a try to get her well and under control. This plan did not work. I had to make a choice then ( per DHR ). It was either choose to continue on my dead end path with her, or choose my three innocent children. I filed for divorce, and was given custody of the three children, one of which ia my step-daughter. I stayed in the same town as her for a while. It became to difficult to handle there with her. I even went to Georgia with her for a short time to get her some help, but she just won’t listen to anyone. I was at my witts end by that time, so I called my folks and came back to live here. She refused to leave Georgia. After much thought and prayer, I realized that he had not left me after all, he had always been there watching over us. I started college and took a huge, new step. Looks like we both have come a long way. I really enjoy your class, so keep on doing what you are doing. It is changiig lives.We need many more humble and truthful men like you. I like your site a lot.
Your Bro. in Christ,
Carey Dunlap

September 26th, 2008 at 11:43 pm

Sonny

Carey,
Thanks for your comments and support. I am amazed at how God works in all of our lives, even when we work against Him. Wouldn’t it be awesome to see what He could do if we all were always working with Him. Love and appreciate you, Brother, more than you know.

September 27th, 2008 at 1:31 am

Nancy

Sonny,

You and Tammy are a blessing to me.

I love God very much and I am so glad that His love for me is not based on what others think of me, how smart I am or how much I understand Him. It is a comfort to me to know He loves me as I am and He has plans for me that I could not ever comprehend. It has been a joy to watch you grow in the Lord and move from glory to glory. I believe God has a enormous plan for your life. Since I have been in your class you have both challenged and confirmed some of my thoughts. Sometimes I feel like a light has gone off in a dark room where I have tucked the wild things I think about God and the Bible. It is great to know that I am not alone in some of the ideas I have about God. We may not always agree but, I hope you continue to be obedient to teach what God puts in your heart. Your wisdom and understanding of Gods Word is amazing-but of course it amazes me that someone knows so much about so many other religions and other stuff. I’m sure some of my comments drive you crazy–Thank you for being such a great teacher.

May God bless you and your family and may He continue to use you as a Watchman on the wall.

September 28th, 2008 at 10:17 pm

Sonny

Nancy,

I am so thankful for everyone who still continues to sit and listen to me share what I believe is being shown to me about the Word of God. The very reason I believe it to be given to me by the Holy Spirit is because I saw the Word in such a different light before.

I know that sometimes things may not seem as relevant as they might but I also believe that I am trying to submit to the Spirit. So there must be something He wants someone to get. I do value your input and everyone elses. And I believe we agree on a lot more issues than we disagree on.

I hope you find some of my thoughts on here at least interesting. But my real prayer is that in some small way I can impact the Kingdom and foil the enemy

I am thankful for you, I appreciate you and I love you.

September 28th, 2008 at 11:35 pm

Sheila

Sonny,
Being your sister I know what a life you had..
I just want to say im so very proud of you & the thing’s you’ve done with your life..
You & Tammy are always a blessing to me & in my thoughts daily..
Keep my family in your prayers we need them & I know you two are powerful in prayer..
I am so thankful that God touched you & your still here with us & God stopped your plans.
You are a very wounderful brother & Blessed by God to have Tammy by your side..
Love Sheila

September 30th, 2008 at 10:01 am

Sonny

Sheila

I probably can’t agree that I am that wonderful a brother. But I do love all of you and pray for you more than you know. I mainly pray that we all end up in eternity together where we will finally have some time. But for now, there is a war going on.

Love you

October 1st, 2008 at 3:37 am

Connie

Sonny,

I love you and Tammy so much.

I did not grow up in church, although I attended some until I became a teenager. I was 43 years old before I asked God to save me. I always knew there was a God; I just didn’t want Him “messing up my lifestyle”. So I kept Him at bay for 31 years.

When Wayne and I first came to ACOG in 1994, I was immediately drawn to Tammy. I kinda knew her, but not real well. I watched her pray for your salvation week after week after week. She never gave up. She was faithful in her prayers. That touched me because I could relate to it so well. My son Jesse started going to church on his own when he was 10. For five long years he prayed for God to save Wayne and me. God listened, and I knew He would do the same for Tammy. I was right. He did.

For a long time I just watched you in awe as you worshiped and praised God. I knew then how Jesse felt when we showed up. How blessed you and I are to have someone here on earth that loves us so much that they would pray without ceasing for us (you and me)that we might know that there was someone greater than them that loved us more than we can ever comprehend. WOW!

God knew just where to place me in His kingdom. I’m not very good at researching and explaining the Word to others. He gave you that job. I teach from “Upper Elementary” level

He just told me to let His love shine through me. He told me to love everybody no matter what their situation, their looks, their iniquities. To let them know that they ARE worthy of God’s love. I’m not perfect, but I do try to do that. I know how it feels to think you are not worthy.

Anyway, I didn’t mean to be so long winded, but I did want you to know that I love you and Tammy very much and I feel blessed to have you in my life. Love reading your blog.

Connie

October 2nd, 2008 at 2:16 pm

Chris

Sorry to be getting in on this so late, but I feel I must.

To all:

I have probably known Sonny longer than any of you (except Aunt Sheila) So I wanted to share a little.

Sonny: I don’t know if I express this enough, but I love you for who you are and who you were. Because without that past you would not have the same perspective you have now. If there truly is a plan in place then God chose the right guy to go to battle with.

Now on a more personal note, that I finally don’t mind sharing, It has been difficult in the past, but this forum just seems right.
For those of you who don’t know my father died when I was eight years old, and not one-day goes by that I do not miss him tremendously. I often sit up at night and think how things could have been different.
I was even younger (I believe less than one) when He and my mother divorced. Then when I was about five my mother met Sonny and he came into our lives. It was difficult to adjust to this new presence in our lives, but I could see that Sonny was a very intelligent and good person. As I grew up there were many good times and many bad times especially in Germany (I still wouldn’t trade any of it). After a few years eight or nine, I don’t remember, Sonny and my mom got a divorce. Now this is where the story gets really cool. Sonny was not my father, and had no obligation to do anything for me at all or even give me the time of day. However, he still took me in as his own and continues even to this day. I am very grateful for that. I had a father that I loved very much, and as I said I miss every day, but Sonny was there for me and was every bit the father that I needed in my life. It may not have been the normal nuclear – two parent, two kid, one and half dog – family, but it worked. I learned so much from Sonny that has helped me in my life. I don’t know if he even realizes it. Through all the “selfishness” he claims, he had a major positive impact on me even before he found God. I don’t know how selfish it is to take the child of a woman whom you just divorced (a constant reminder of all the problems and pain) and treat him just like your own child, but he did it. While my journey continues, I am so excited and thankful to know that if I need him Sonny will be there for my family and me.

Once again, I am sorry to be so long winded. I actually have many more things to say about how great Sonny is, but I will save that for another time.

Sonny glad you are still here. Love you very much.

October 22nd, 2008 at 9:41 pm

Sonny

Chris,

You really don’t know what you or these words mean to me. Or how timely. But that is not for here.

I love you, son.

October 23rd, 2008 at 12:01 am

Jason

Sonny,

I truly enjoy reading your posts! Please forgive me that I don’t post comments very often, but I wanted to add one to let you know that I am reading here in Jasper.

I hope we can all get together for a time of fellowship in the future, because I know the posts but have yet to meet the man.

Please keep up the great job of advancing the Kingdom…. my prayers are with you!

In Christ,
Jason Daughdrill

January 20th, 2009 at 9:32 pm

Sonny

Thanks Jason,

I really appreciate the fact that you and others that are out doing so much for the Kingdom read and find something of worth in what I have to say. I check in on yours often but do know that you are busy and don’t get to post much. I just happen to have loads of time due to my work (construction) and the economy.

I told Shannon not long ago that I was hoping we could meet sometime soon.

Love you

January 20th, 2009 at 10:34 pm