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Running.  Not fast.  Not slow.  Just running. 

I am running, and have been, for so very long.  I can’t even remember when I started.  Why am I running?  Because I am being chased. 

I don’t know who is chasing me.   I know that I cannot let them catch me.  I can’t see them when I glance back, but I can feel them.  Somehow I know they, or he, is close.  I pick up the pace, even though the pain is becoming unbearable. 

Breathing. Just catching enough of that life sustaining substance called oxygen, has become one of the most important things, in life.  I gasp, for that sweet, invisible element of life itself, with an urgency, that displays my struggle.  The effort to catch my breath almost, overwhelms the pain.  Almost.

The pain.  I try to work through the pain. The pain is in every part of my body.  Needles piercing my shins.  Fire settling into my thighs.  Intense pressure on my lower back.  Cramps in my sides.  Acid filling my lungs. 

Running.  Endlessly.  A glance over my shoulder again.  No sign of my pursuer but, I know he is closing in on me.  I can feel it.

The pain grows. Transforms.  Metamorphoses’ into a wholly different kind of pain, that is worse than before.  The needles, fire, and pressure, are still there, but seem distant. Still excruciating and intense.  But now there are new pains. 

The sweat has drenched my clothing and causes it to rub raw any part of me that is in contact.  And that, is all of me.

Running. How long must I keep this up?  As I said, I don’t even know how long I have been running.  Maybe all my life.  How long?  Had I really been running all my life?  Impossible, but, I cannot remember a time, when I was not running.  When did I start running?  I JUST WANT TO STOP!  Just let him catch me and see what will happen.  But I can’t.  I am scared. 

The pain again.  My shoes hitting the ground with a wet sloppy sounding plop.  This is probably from the sweat and the blood.  Yes, blood.  I have been running so long, that the blisters seem to form, fill and burst every second.  Or so it seems.  And the raw places, all over my body, are starting to bleed.  Looking back, I see a trail of blood, sweat and tears that my enemy cannot help but follow easily.

Tears?  They start flowing like a steady stream as if someone, has left a faucet on.  Mixing, with the sweat and blood.  Or, am I just, crying tears of, blood?

The sweating stops.  The tears form dry crusty trails on my face.  Nasal passages are dry, and on fire.  I need hydration.  But the blood still flows freely, from various parts of my body.  Who would have thought, that you could run yourself to death.  This is what I am doing.  Maybe, I will just stop. 

I stumble, and almost fall.  Barely catching myself in time.  Another glance back gives me the impression that he is almost on me.  Still can’t see him though.  The enemy.  Why is he chasing me? 

Running.  The pain.  A wave of terror engulfs me as I realize that, I have to stop.  Can’t go on.   Every inch of my body is screaming in pain.  Even the cells.  A human being is not made to be in perpetual motion.   

A truth suddenly occurs to me.  It is okay.  I do not have to fear anymore.  It is time to die.  Nothing in life is worth keeping on this way.  And the sting of death, cannot possibly, compare, to the pain I have endured.  Running.  From my invisible enemy.  Maybe all my life. 

I stop.  Ready to die. 

Then I am hit from behind, and tackled and taken to the ground.  Bowled over by the moon.  Or so it seems.

The power that is against me is, incomprehensible.  I struggle.  I cry out with a sound that I cannot imagine a man could make.  I only thought I had felt pain.  But this, is pain.  The running had caused excruciating pain but this is torturous, unendurable.  It feels like mountains are being slammed into me.  I scream, and wrestle, and scream.

All while I marvel at the realization that my enemy is, really, invisible. He seems to be absorbing me.  Becoming one with me.  Taking over my very being.  I am no more but, I am still here.  Please, just let me die, or kill me fast. 

Suddenly, I realize the pain, is subsiding.  I realize he is not, and has not caused me any pain.  He is, actually, removing it.  But, the removal is more intense than the original occurrence.  But the pain, is decreasing.  And in its place, another sensation.  One that I don’t know.  I have never felt this.  I do not know the name for it.  But it is, good. 

Then, in an instant, all of the pain is gone.  And the enemy?  Or is he?  The presence, seems to be separating from me.  I feel like me now.  But not me.  He is gone, but not totally.  He left some of himself, with me, and in me.  And I am not me.  I am new.  Different.  Alive.  For the first time in my life. 

I know all things.  I know nothing.  I have been reborn.  Or born again.  I am a new creation.  Sensations I could not name a few moments ago.  Could this be-peace.  And joy unspeakable. 

My enemy?  Chasing me all my life.  To harm me?  No. Only trying to give me a precious gift.  He was not my enemy.  I was his.  But for some strange, and incredible reason, He loves me.  And gives me the gift– of Himself.

Why?  Why did I run? 

Now I stand.  Alive for the first time in my life. 

Amazed.

Love you all

Tags: Audio, God, Grace, Hope, Love, Personal, Rebirth, Running, Salvation, Testimony