“O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord.”  Psalm 139: 1-4

Do you matter?  Do I?  Do our lives truly have any meaning?  These questions seem to drive all of us at a very basic level.  It is very hard to live alone.  Even in the darkest days of my previous uncaring, unloving past I still felt a need to connect with someone, sometimes.  Now that I have been changed by the knowledge of what God has done for me, I need it even more.  We all need a witness.

We need a witness because we want our lives to matter and we can only believe they do if someone notices.  This is probably why I want to write these thoughts and post them on a blog for others to see.  This is a spiritual desire, or hunger.  And most people have it.  The proof is right here on the internet.  When the internet was just beginning to take shape one of the first things that connected people globally was known as bulletin boards.  Places where like-minded souls, mostly geeks, gathered in virtual town squares to share and discuss the important things in their lives.  And these things were not important to most people but there is always someone that values what we see as worthwhile.  These bulletin board subscribers did not see each other or really know each other but the desire for a connection, a witness to a small part of their lives was great and no one could have predicted where it would eventually go.

Today we have blogs, forums, Facebook, Twitter and many more.  These types of sites have allowed all of us to let every one of our “friends” know exactly what we are doing at any given time.  And we really think that they all care what time we got up and what we had for breakfast or the even more mundane daily tasks associated with living.  I won’t even go into the distorted theme of friendship.  What spurs all of this if it isn’t a spiritual hunger?  A ravenous need for a witness?  We want someone, maybe everyone, to notice us.  We want validation through their observation of our lives that we do matter.  Their attention tells us that our lives count.

I want someone to read this and to comment.  This makes this whole point I am trying to make, true in my own life.  But there is also a truth that surpasses this need.  I already have a witness.  In fact, I have a couple of them.  As the first few verses of Psalm 139 show, God is watching everything I do.  He reads my mind and knows my motivations.  He knows all of those intimate little moments in my life and there is no way I can hide them from him even if I wanted to.  Which occasionally I do, I am embarrassed to say.  Jesus and the sacrifice he made prove that I truly do matter.

The second witness is my wife.  She is the one, the only one, who voluntarily agreed to witness my life.  She agreed to care about what I care about, to share life with me and all the ups and downs that it brings.  She knows things about me that no one else but God knows and she can be trusted to keep what needs to be secret just that.  She knows the good, the bad and the ugly things about me.  She shares in the exciting and the mundane.  She let me know on the day she said “I do” that my life would not go unnoticed and that I matter.  And I will do and be the same for her.

I want friends.  I want to be noticed and recognized as someone of worth.  I am sure you do also.  But ultimately, in those times that everyone else seems to be missing in my life, I can count on this-my wife and my God are my witness.

Love you all

Just wanted to say hi and see if anyone was still out there that might read this.  I started this blog because a friend talked me into it and actually enjoyed the writing and the discussions that it prompted for about a year.  During that year I was sitting at home, doing nothing but getting fat, old and weak due to a lack of work.  Cabinets are hard to sell during this current economic situation.  This is what actually led to a major decision I made, also prompted by friends and my wife.  I enrolled in the University of Alabama at Birmingham as a pre-nursing major at the age of forty-nine.  Then my life changed drastically.

I had to quit teaching Sunday school and a Wednesday night adult class at my church.  I ultimately did not even have much time to attend church.  I also decided to check out some other denominations when I could, not looking for anything in particular, just wanting to see if any of the things I had read about in my studies for classes were true or false.  I also attempted to get as far as possible in my freshman year of college to free up my summer to try to find some work, completing 37 credit hours in these two semesters.  My wife and I have to rely on God more and more as the financial resources are finally gone.  We have seen some awesome signs of Christ in some of those we know and love during the past few months.  Thank God for his people.

We have had some personal tragedies during the past few months that have also affected our lives in ways that we could have never foreseen.  One occurrence in particular is life-changing and will never be over until we enter eternity.  Again, some of Gods children have been there for us and I believe they always will be.  I am thankful for the concern, the support and the prayers of these saints every day.

I want to write some more this summer if I have some time.  I need work though, so that will be my priority.  I start my second year of college in August if the money to pay our bills is available.  This post is short and rambling and is really just an attempt to re-enter the waters.  It is also a simple thank you to all that read this and know of our plight and continue to pray for us.  We covet these prayers. We know that God is here, even if he does not seem to be at times.  We need you, we need God, and we

Love you all

Sorry about missing last weeks post.  I have been swamped with study and all of a sudden, work also.  And this week is short too but I wanted to at least get this Tuesday post out.  Thanks for your continued support for this blog.

We all talk about praying and having a relationship with God.  We talk to Him and this implies that he also speaks to us.  Not only in prayer but some say He guides and directs them also.

Does God speak to us today?

How does He speak to us?

How does He speak to you if He does?

Love you all

My Dad’s name was Bill Cable.  He was not my biological father but he adopted me when I was only two years old and I never knew or met the man that was there when I was conceived.  He is a father also, to me and others later, I heard, so I hope he has a great day also if he still lives.  But he was not my Dad.  Bill Cable was.

I did not even know that I was adopted until sometime in my fourteenth year.  And Bill never gave me any reason to even think it.  I have a sister and two brothers that he was the biological father of but there was never any favoritism.  Well, actually there might have been at times, but it was favoritism towards me.  He loved me as much as or seemingly even more sometimes as any of us.

He was a small man.  Standing only 5′ 2″ tall and weighing about 125 pounds, I still remember him having me sit in his lap when I got out of the Army at six feet tall and 185 pounds.  It was ridiculous looking probably but I am smiling just thinking about it.  My eyes are a little watery also.

Bill Cable, my Dad, died in 1991 at the age of 55.  Much too young and way too early to go.  I miss him.  I don’t talk about it much but before Jesus introduced Himself to me there was no other person on this planet that I felt comfortable telling my deepest secrets, fears, dreams, and thoughts to than my Dad.  I never have been a very open person and have just started growing into it in the last few years even to the degree I am now.  But my Dad would listen, never judge, and tell me like he saw it.  It was not always comfortable but it was real.  How many people tell anyone anything real anymore?  Not enough.  At least not in my life or experience.

Even though I had the best example for a loving father, not a perfect man by any means, but a real, truly loving man which is what really matters, that anyone could have, I still blew it when it came my time.  I have six children.  Five of them are sons that are not mine biologically.  While I do believe I loved them a long time ago, I know I did not do it the right way.  Some of it was me, some was the enemy of all of our souls, but mostly it was my lack of belief that that enemy or God was real.  My Father, God, has and still is, changing me.  I thank Him for that most of all because I do not like who I used to be.

We all have a Father in heaven, whether we have one here or not.  And He is good and gracious and merciful and loving, but most of all He is real.  And He tells us like it is.  If we will only listen.

If you have a father here, let him know you love him and appreciate him today.  Even if he was or is not who you think he should be, he is your father.  And who among us is who our Father, God, wants us to be anyway.  And if you are a father, then be the best one you can be while you still have time.

Happy Fathers Day to all and Dad, I miss you and love you.

Love you all